11.12.2013

Good intentions

I had this great resolve a few weeks ago to jump back into the blogging world again, but here I am, weeks later, and still haven't written one word.
The phrase I keep saying in my head day after day and hour after hour is: "HOW in the WORLD do moms with multiple children DO THIS?!" Holy shnikey I swear I have zero seconds in the day to spend to myself. I don't want to go on and on about our ongoing sleeping issues in this household, but that's part of the problem. Add battling a never ending cold for Cole and me on top of that, and the sleep issues exponentiate.
Cole is literally into everything. He figures out how to pile blankets and stuffed animals inside his crib so he can climb out during nap time. He and I climb the stairs at least fifty thousand times a day, and luckily, Cole is the only one who falls down them about ten thousand times a day. The animals are left without food and water, because I don't agree with feeding my child cat and dog food for breakfast, brunch, lunch, linner, and dinner. I pull Cole out of the kitchen drawers, pry scissors out of his hands, run after him when he has pulled out the floor vents again and tried to climb inside, put bandaids on his tiny, super wiggly hands when he cuts them on said floor vents, and clean up blood all over the floors (oh yeah, and spit up too...why in the world are we still battling that problem?). I change my wallflowers from one outlet, to another outlet, to another outlet, only to have them all put on top of the fridge, give Cole half of my half peanut butter & honey sandwich (as if a half sandwich is enough for a starving pregnant lady anyway, now I'm left with a fourth), move the TV back so he won't pull it over again, and box up the last bits of decorations that I have tried desperately to keep out, but can't keep hands OFF of. I pull him out from under my bed and remove 5 or 6 electrical cords out of his mouth, save him after he does yet another front flip out of his jumper (we bought that thing to keep him contained so I could shower for heaven sakes...now he does front flips out of it), and I try to stay patient during his temper tantrums.
Let me remind you that Cole turned 11 months old today.
Let me also remind you that I am beginning my 6th month of pregnancy. I am getting bigger. I am hungry. I am oh so tired.
HOW in the WORLD do moms with multiple children DO THIS?!
Poor Shane is a different story. That incredible man leaves home at 5:30 in the morning to get to work, and most nights doesn't get back until 10:00 at night. The days when he is home at 5, I rush off to teach ballet. Then he has homework (lots of it), and scoutmaster duties. He is so busy and as you can imagine, so, so tired. I feel like I can't support him at all...heavens, I can't even get dinner on the table for him. It makes me feel awful just thinking about that.
I have Nutcracker coming up next week which is a HUGE, completely magical production that takes a lot of time and effort. I was given a second calling as the Relief Society Committee Chairperson. Do you know what that person does? I didn't. The chairperson organizes and runs all of the evening meetings (activities) that the Relief Society sisters go to throughout the year. Yeah. Our big Christmas one is coming right up - and I'm barely keeping my head above water. Cole is turning ONE the day after the Christmas activity. The day after that, Shane is graduating from college. And then BOOM! Christmas is here.
My eyes are currently cross-eyed and my heart is beating much faster than it should be - I'm certain.
Last week, my sister showed up to find me in a heap of tears, mostly from exhaustion. She scooped up my little Cole pickle and gave me a couple hours to relax. Today, my mom did the same thing so that I could finally get some things done for this Relief Society night. I keep wondering when I am going to get on top of my life...wondering when I will stop having breakdowns every other day. The cold hard truth is that I know it's not going to end...in fact, it's only going to get harder. In a few short months, this house is going to be the home for another sweet little baby boy - and heaven help us all when that happens.
I am going to be a mom with multiple children.
oh
my
gosh.